Friday, July 10, 2009

What do you think

I am not sure on my feeling or how should I felt during the stay. I have been living like this for the past few years, not to feel. Intimite feeling, feeling towards my father or any other person.

I have had enough pain when my dearest mother passed away. It was bad and until some friends keep reminding me to come out from the depression. I managed to crawl out but it is no longer the same.

I did not know that it can be so helpless when world or my life did not mean anything anymore.

I regret that I had shut down the feeling. I prayed for it to come back.

When I tried again to feel but the "black period" reminded and kept me away to try to go back there....to be passionate again...

I have had friends called me heartless, I am not, I am afraid not at all.

I have had friends called me expressionless..., I am not a good actor..it shows what you feel deep inside...

I have lost the touch..

I still remembered how I cried when my kitten passed away..

I still remembered how I cant eat after watching the sudanese documentary...

I want it to come back..to be a better person to be once again the caring person inside and out..

Is it gone ...is it for good..

Is it worthwhile..

Is it GOD has created a path that would mould me to be ready in the situation that need a strong head person like me..

Is it ....what do you think ?

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